Different Hats

Sometimes life works in mysterious ways. One minute, things are going great and it feels like your going in the right direction. Trying to do the right things to live a successful existence. Then in the blink of an eye, that can all change.

Change can be a good thing, but before the good must come the bad.

Bad things happen to good people, and good things happen to bad people.

A hard lesson can be a rewarding pleasure after all.

Once upon a time, not very long ago, I got to experience what it feels like to be homeless. Yes, for a short period of time I had no place to call my home.

Now, how and what happened to reach that point in life is not important. What I do consider to be important is the fact that part of my life is over, and now I’m sitting at my desk writing about my unique story.

Now, I must admit, my homeless journey was not that long – two months to be exact, and there was a light at the end of the tunnel. We had a place to live, it just wasn’t the right time to move in, so we had to be patient.

My family was divided, and my Mother and I were the ones to live life on the road. My son was safe and housed with family (thankfully) until it was time for all of us to team up again.

Do you know what it feels like to leave behind loved ones, personal belongings, and all of that jazz? It hurts. It still breaks my heart to this day and I’m trying to heal from the situation two years later.

We left that day, our old house that did not belong to us from the start. The community garbage can was crammed with some of our stuff that we could not bring along with us. My car was filled with things deemed important like toiletries, clothing, and some snacks. It was my new home that I would share with my mother.

We lived in a condo unit and shared it with other neighbors. The place itself was unwelcoming – terrible security, shared parking spots that were stolen by outsiders, I even had this one neighbor who used to put dog shit on my door step. Basically, every other unit had a dog, including us, but for some reason she thought it was us not picking it up. It was the upstairs neighbor and her cream-colored yappy dog. But she did this multiple times, even when we confronted her about it. I think she had a fetish playing with dog poopies.

As bittersweet as it was to face the reality of becoming homeless, it was so liberating to walk away from this hellhole with our middle fingers sticking out of our Honda Pilot windows.

Oh! I have to mention that our dog got to share on this experience as well. There was no way in hell I was going to give him up for adoption after everything this family had just gone through.

So the first night of being homeless was spent at one of our jobs, a bowling alley. We slept on linoleum floors with thin carpets. We slept on the bowling lanes with blankets. We slept on the party room with souped-up mattress foam beds.

We lived at a bowling alley center for one week.

I learned to how to bathe in the bathroom with a bucket filled with water and some rags.

I ate snacks instead of meals.

I sat in the car for hours while waiting for something to happen.

I cried most of the time trying to figure out why things had to go down this way.

I learned that life is not fair, and that’s okay.

After one week at the bowling alley, another job of ours heard the news about what had happened to us. The pastor from the church reached out with an invitation to stay and shelter. It was such relief to hear kind words. A blessing in a white robe who gave us a chance to rebound from this ultimate nightmare.

We packed up what little things we had, and moved on out to our next setting.

In an upscale, money-flaunting town, sits a historic church on Main Street with a red door. Our new home.

It was already a familiar place, but with more privacy and comfort. I was so thankful just to sit down on a couch and relax for a second without wincing in pain.

Again, not long we lived here, maybe for about three or four weeks. We got to have the chance to live in a millionaire-based town while poor. I took on some new work and for a while I was a landscaper. I took care of the church properties and made sure it looked presentable for the public. Our family was able to come over to the church frequently where we ate food, shared smiles, and spent nights together.

Time was ticking and the weeks were flying by, but it still felt so long before it was time for our new home. To be together again with my family and feel whole.

We did as much work as possible to make time go by faster. We never stopped working from the beginning, that’s not what caused the homeless situation.

One day, another customer of ours reached out to us – she cried the blues about being a lonely old woman and she needed company. She opened her home to us, an invitation to live with an elderly widow in an upscale retirement community. On the condition we help her out and make her feel happy again in life.

So we agreed to her terms and accepted our new living arrangement. This time, we had upgraded to our own bathrooms, separate bedrooms, and even more privacy.

We lived here with this woman for the remainder of our homeless journey. Took care of her and her needs, while balancing our crazy lifestyle.

As low as well fell down, each day was another step back up.

Each week was a new challenge to face.

In the end, the pieces fell in place.

A phone call changed everything one day, it was finally over.

It was time to go home.

We packed all of our things up, said our thank yous and goodbyes, and together our family moved in our new home.

A new beginning.

Living life while homeless in New Jersey was quite a challenge, but in the end we survived.

I feel like a new person now.

I understand that bad things can happen to good people, and because of those bad things, new opportunities and doors can open up a new world.

A new world of appreciating the things I have now, such as my family and health.

I no longer care about buying clothes or jewelry. I save my money and spend only when it is necessary. I don’t need much material items to live a happy life. I try not to overindulge.

I understand that anything can happen to anyone at any given moment, and we should be prepared for that “just in case” scenario.

Not everyone will have compassion for the homeless which is unfortunate. Not many people are willing to help other humans struggling. It’s the lowest point one could reach in life.

But that’s okay.

We did it anyway.

I feel like a new person again.

Stronger than I could ever imagine myself to be.

I’ve been blessed to have a place to call home again, where I prepare homemade meals, clean up the messes, and snuggle with my children.

I think about other people who are homeless and what they could be possibly going through. My contribution is the donations of food, snacks, and toys that we collect from dumpster diving. At least it’s something.

I will never forget what I had to go through, feeling alone and vulnerable to society. Judged, rejected, turned-away, ignored, belittled, outcast-ed.

But I will enjoy my home.